New Year New Life New Environment

Salam blog. It's been a long time since I last used this blog..
Dah berlapuk dah blog ni...
Hmm Sedih lah hidup.. Hidup aku sentiasa naik turun..
I think you should know my story life for the past two years..
I have graduated from MAIAI-Irsyad 2011. The best batch I've ever had..
January 19 2009 during sec 3 Ayah had gotten a Stroke disease. I can still remember vividly what had happend to my dad. 12.00 He vomitted while sleeping. Everyone was doing their own work. Mum was talking on the phone. Kakak and Datuk were busy studying. Bibik was half-asleep. I was studying chemistry in the living room. After having dinner with my family,dad straight away went to Atuk's chair and sat on it while reading the newspaper at the same time eating the fruits that mum had cut for him.He turn on the television. Normally I would asked him to turn off the tv while I was studying. But, strangely on that day he said " Ayah matikan tv eh dik"... So he stopped everything and straight away went to sleep. His face was kindda stressed.. I don't know stressed bcoz of what.. but maybe bcoz of work..maybe there is something that's bothering him.Yeah I knew about his heart disease ,high-blood pressure-diabetes.. until he got few blockage-stenosis almost 90% in his artery.. I was scared. So, back to the story, before he vomitted, he coughed about 3 times - hard. I thought it was normal. BUT NOT!. So, I called my mum-sis and everyone in the family. "kak, mama, asal ngn Ayah? adik takut". I tried to remain calm in that situation. But I can't bcoz everyone was crying as if dad's going to leave us. Sis called the ambulance and mum accompanied dad to the hospital. - Stroller-lay a man -face as white as a paper - purpled eyelids purple-lips. worst of all, the paramedics asked my dad to hold onto the plastic for him to vomit. In that situation. He was half-concious and how could her! I didn't know that was my last moment of talking to him. I didn't even remember when was the last time I said sorry to him..Hence 6 months bed-ridden in the hopital... Mum had to give medical home care for dad.. Luckily bibk budi's still working with us. She indeed a great,wonderful worker..Then, one thing I noticed about myself was that I began to change in my attitude and studies. I became more sensitive and lose hope.. Initially when I got to know that my father was sicked.. I want to change for the better.. Atuk also helped us a lot in terms of faith and religious stuffs.. That brings us closer to Allah. Alhamdulillah. Then came 2010 STE years.. Despite the time spent in school.. Atuk's health condition soon depleted... There was a strange change in him... Suddenly all his illness gone.. Though,during june school holidays.. Atuk became weak again. He was sick for almost 1 week. All kinds of medical treatment was given to him. But to no avail. Thus he was admitted to the hospital. After discharged from hospital My aunt took care of him . It WAS HARD for my mum to leave atuk... 54 years of being with him and just like that to be seperated. sad right?.. Then.. atuk was admitted back to the hospital bcoz of respiratory illness.. One day during the 2nd of ramadhan..08.30 int the morning we heard the bad new... Atuk had passed away. On that day also I had taken my Prelim STE paper.. SAD.. soon my spirit of studying dropped. Next after for about 6 months.. Dad's turn to go.27 February 2011-S5. Afterwards my unle passed away.. the next 2 days... SAD. That really - really dropped my spirit man..

Seolah-olah hidup ini tiada erti.. Alhamdulillah I managed to pull myself and bring back my consciences. Hanya tinggal Mama dan Kakak. Orang rapat ku.. Nanti bile kakak nak gi Mesir adik keseorangan pulak dgn mama.. SAD. AKu hanya berharap agar kesunyian tersebut dapat diisi dengan al- Quran dan sentiasa mengingati Allah da Rasulnya. 2011 menjadi saksi kepada segala usaha yang aku lakukan utk o-level.. Walaupun Natijahnya tidak bagus tapi ku tetap bersyukur.. Kerana Ini menjadi detik-saat-saat dimana N.R.S akan BANGKIT semula. Tidak akan menyerah kalah. Tidak akan sia-siakan waktu yang diberikan. AKU SEBAGAI SEORANG ANAK akan membanggakan kedua ibu-bapa ku.. Walaupun bapaku telah pergi.. AKU akan berubah demi kebaikan. Belajar dengan tekun dan yakin Allah sentiasa berasama. Ya Muqallibal qulub tsabit qulubi ala diinika wa ala to'atika. Ya rabbbi al -falah wan Najah fil Mustaqbal Insya-Allah. Next- Ahsan level to go!